Maths degree kicking in at the worst time. Standing there naked doing the dates in my head while he waited. “Is this one expired or am I thick?” Mood died. I still did the sum. Correctly.
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Showing off the thing I am actually good at, feeling smug, then my calf locked like a brick. I shouted. He thought it was a bit. It was not a bit. I hopped to the kitchen swearing.
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Hotel after the work do because I am an idiot. Thin walls. Next morning my actual manager was at breakfast looking like she had heard every filthy second. I asked for the bill in a whisper.
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Saturday hookup at his, hungover, door goes. It was the entertainer for his niece’s party. Full costume. Red nose. I made a noise I did not know I could make and hid in the bathroom shaking.
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On all fours feeling proper pleased with myself when his spaniel hopped up and licked the back of my thigh. I shrieked. He thought it was hot. I nearly cried. Poor dog. I still want a refund.
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Delayed train, empty disabled toilet, terrible idea. Someone knocked. I froze with my skirt up and whispered “occupied” like I was twelve. We both walked out separately and never spoke on the platform.